Episode 60: What is Mrs. Gloop Doing?

In Minute 60, we discover that there’s no better time to learn to swim than when you’re drowning. By the end of the minute, we have officially lost our first child. Veruca, oddly, shows some compassion…and her father does not. David tries to decide whether or not you would actually need a plumber to extricate Augustus. Mrs. Gloop makes a series of inappropriate faces that David and Jason get a kick out of. Also, David has a problem with Grandpa Joe…surprise!

We’ll see you back here on Monday.

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Episode 41: R.I.P. Chuckles

Welcome to the middle of the week!

In minute 41, Grandpa Joe continues to sing while bounicing off walls, throwing clothes on the floor, and never really using the cane that he had Charlie get him. We have a discussion about Grandpa Joe’s assertion that he is “slap in the lap of luxury.” David discusses Peter Ostrum’s singing, and whether or not his vocals should have been dubbed. Also, what would’ve happened if the ticket had not allowed an additional guest to come along?

We’ll see you back here on Friday.

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Episode 39: Birth Control Glasses

In minute 39, Charlie shows off his man strength, hoisting dead weight Grandpa Joe to his feet, and Joe almost kills Charlie. Apparently, Joe has been laying in bed for 20 years just waiting for someone to help him get out. We think he’s just a liar. We posit a theory about how it is that Grandpa Joe’s muscles haven’t atrophied from disuse. Also, how does Mrs. Bucket feel about Grandpa Joe walking? How do the other grandparents feel, especially considering Charlie’s favoritism?

Have a great weekend, and we’ll see you back here on Monday!

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Episode 38: Goldschl├Ąger and Chocolate

Time for a mid-week sweet treat!

In minute 38, Charlie finishes his story, and Grandpa Joe reads the Golden Ticket to confirm its authenticity. Charlie expresses a wish to take Grandpa Joe on the tour, which, of course, leads to Grandpa Joe miraculously getting out of bed. David spends a lot of time expressing his sympathy for Mrs. Bucket. David also draws comparisons between Mike Teevee and Charlie’s grandparents.

We’ll see you back here on Friday!

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Episode 37: A Very Special Episode

Welcome to your Monday pick me up!

In minute 37, Slugworth finishes his proposition, and Charlie runs home and tells his family about his good fortune. They don’t believe him, and he tells the story of finding the ticket. Does Slugworth’s offer come with conditions, like investing? What is Slugworth’s pitch to the other kids? We give our thoughts. Also, how creepy is Slugworth? This creepy?

That’s really creepy.

Sorry…I think I just brought down the room.

We’ll see you back here on Wednesday.

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Episode 34: Nazi Crooks

Welcome to your new week!

In this minute, Charlie buys a second chocolate bar. When he gets outside, he finds quite a scene, with people crowding around the newsstand. Apparently the last ticket found was a fake. You don’t say? (#Nazis) Were goatees a thing in 1971, because there’s one guy with one, and he looks kinda out of place. Charlie finishes out the minute with a furtive glance, and who knows what’s next?

See you on Wednesday to find out!

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Episode 28: Rubbing Off on Grandpa Joe

Welcome to your new week!

We begin this week talking about the last box of chocolate in the United Kingdom, or that’s what the auctioneer says. Jason thinks that Charlie is an oracle…or, at least, he thinks that Grandpa Joe thinks Charlie is an oracle. Charlie tries to keep a stiff upper lip, and Grandpa Joe comforts him with a very genuine hug. Possibly his most genuine moment of the movie. Also, there’s an auction.

During the plugs section, Jason’s audio went wonky, and he tried to give a shoutout to the Glengarry Glen Ross Minute podcast. Just wanted to clarify.

See you back here on Wednesday

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Episode 27: Al Pacino Is Not In This Movie

Happy Friday!

We end the week talking about the parenting techniques of the Teevee family, and compare them to the Salt family. Stanley Kael is in this minute with all his sartorial splendor (see picture above). The hole in the map has been covered, and Jason takes it personally. Also, how does Grandpa Joe wake Charlie up, and why does he continue to keep chocolate gifts in the oddest of places?

See you next week!

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Episode 21: A Deadly Sin (In the Name of Love)

Happy Friday! To end the week, we discuss the nature of car dealer infomercials, and share fond memories of King of Cars. What does Violet do with her gum when she’s sleeping? And what does the word friend mean to Violet? Also, haven’t I seen that car detailer somewhere before?

Additionally, we respond to a Twitter comment, and discuss what might have happened to Mr. Bucket.

Have a great weekend, and come back next week as we continue to do this!

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